Was interrupted 10-ish by a call from H. I told him I was working on it. I told him, rather foolishly, that I was confident of finding somewhere that would take the bike today and pay cash, and I thought I could get around $300 for it. I said I'd ring him when I had anything to say.
He called again at 11.15. He sounded like he was about to have a nervous breakdown. He said he was going to lose everything. He said they were going to be evicted. He said he was going to have to quit his job. It wasn't making a whole lot of sense.
Queried the situation. Apparently the Rental Tribunal was involved, via their real estate agent, and H had to somehow come up with $210 and deliver it by 1pm or else they were going to be evicted. Meantimes he was working (courier) and work wouldn't let him take a couple of hours off. And never mind that he didn't have anything left to hock or sell anyway.
I leaned back against the wall and beat my head against it slightly. There was something I could do, one last thing I could do to raise $200-odd in a helluva hurry.
"Look," I said, "There is one thing I can do to help. Give me the details and I'll go there and give them the money. Don't quit your job. Don't do anything drastic."
He was actually crying.
I didn't feel like there was anything to say other than insisting I could save his butt.
He wanted to know how I was going to come up with the money. I said it wasn't illegal or immoral but he didn't need to know the details. I said I'd tell him later, once I'd reconciled myself to what I was about to do.
Got the address and phone number of the real estate, the name of the rep, James' surname... Told H to please be calm, it would be okay, they weren't going to be evicted, and I'd ring him when it was all done.
Sat quietly for a minute, trying to be calm, trying not to cry. Took two Valiums with the rest of my coffee and headed out. Oh, after grabbing the thing I was going to sell.
You don't need to know what it is. My nanna gave it to me for my 21st and my mother will kill/disown me if she ever finds out I don't have it any more. So the less you know, the less chance there is of her ever finding out.
Walked down two blocks, cut across the park, down another two blocks. Fronted up with a bright smile and my receptionist-type phone-manner voice and a concocted story about my best friend needing gap payments for urgent medical treatment. Showed ID and proof of ownership. Walked out with $235.
Went another two blocks down to the taxi rank. There was one taxi. I hurried ahead of a woman carrying several bags of groceries and jumped in the front seat. Fortunately it was pretty much a straight-line trip to H's real estate people, and therefore a reasonable fare (though I did tip the guy $2.50 and wished him good karma). Got there about 12.20.
Chose my words carefully but deployed them casually. Made out I was a friend of James', acting on his behalf (H had said "don't mention my name"). Made cheerful remarks about what a lovely day it was (more like summer, it was, than winter). Handed over the money. Their computer promptly froze, so the girl had to write a manual receipt. The rep came out to have a few words. After being assured James (*cough*) would not be evicted I took the receipt and limped up the hill to the train station (at some point I had sprouted a blister).
Rang H, told him it was done. He said thank you. He was amazed that I had managed to bail him out yet again. He sounded very calm and normal. Then he said there was just one more thing, but... no, he wasn't going to ask me. "Tell me what it is. Tell me anyway, and I'll tell you if I can help." I said, hoping it was an errand he needed running, not more money. No, it's more money. My head was just about spinning by then so some of the info didn't stick, but I got the bit about him needing $50 to save something that was in hock. I said I could probably come up with another fifty and I'd ring him later to confirm.
Got a train, then a bus. There was an express post envelope waiting for me when I got back. Something from the lenders. Something about "contrary to our previous advice (reference phone call blah blah blah) we require you to formally resubmit account details... please find forms attached... blah blah blah".
Meaning that even if I got my account reinstated today they would not put the money into it until they got these goddamn forms back. So I filled it out with the details of my cheque account (which was not my first choice because it's not linked to my credit cards) and put it in the return express post envelope to mail once I got to K street.
Grabbed my camcorder and all its cables etc and took a bus up to K street and hocked the fucker. Rang H and said I'd hocked my camcorder for $50 so would he like to come by later to collect that and the rent receipt...
Went to the post office to mail the forms back to the lenders.
Came home and cried myself to sleep.
Was woken sometime after 7 by H calling to say he'd be by shortly. Couldn't remember what day it was. Had to bring the puter out of standby so I could hover on the system tray to find out.
H didn't want to come in. He seemed far too normal, all things considered. I needed a hug. I needed, more than ever, for him to tell me I mean something to him. Couldn't ask. Couldn't be so "mean" as to require something of him while he's still in a bad place, generally speaking. So I got something like half a hug and a kiss on the back of the hand, then he left.
Rang Alice and we worked a little deal whereby she will pay my next quarter's internet bill in exchange for me knitting woolly bedsocks and caps for each of her kids, and a pair of fingerless gloves for her hubby. She promised not to tell mum what I'd done to myself (meaning that I'd been sticking my neck out financially for H; I didn't tell her what I sold today).
And since then I have been online, distracting myself with other people's lives.
I'm going to be absent for a few days, though. I'm in a permanent state of panic and I feel sick to the core about the whole situation. I need an emergency session with my shrink and something stronger than Valium. I need a few days off. I need a break from the whole world.
I'll try to keep writing stuff down while I'm away, but no updates should be expected for a few days.